Using virtual social as a means to combat loneliness
The parents among us definitely feel as though they have it the hardest when it comes to lockdown, but I’ve been noticing a trend of loneliness through my friends that live in solitude. Of course, the vulnerable and the old fit into this category also, and without taking anything away from them, I’d like to focus a little on this group that appear to receive less attention.
Living alone (even by choice) can take a serious toll on your mental health if it’s not kept in check and, unfortunately, just keeping busy isn’t enough to satiate the internal desires we have to be social. Humans, through necessity, have evolved into social beings. Referring back to the Stone Age, our dependence on each other enhanced our ability to survive under even the harshest of environmental circumstances.
I appreciate these survival threats are no longer prevalent, however, people continue to have a need to affiliate with others. As a matter of fact, the lack of such connections can lead to many problems, including loneliness.
Knowing this, I wanted to put together my top five ways to combat loneliness through this collectively rough time:
Social supper: One of my dear friends has a weekly double-dinner-date with another couple friend that they know. Now, of course, you live alone! I get it. But, it’d be easy to arrange a weekly or bi-monthly dinner date with a friend (or multiples of) where you all jump on Zoom at the same time and have your dinner together. You can choose a theme, dress up if you really want to, choose an adult beverage you’re all going to drink and ensure you keep tabs on each other’s lives through a simple online dinner format.
Chatty monkeys: Not having the pubs open is a giant drag. One way to keep the love alive with your closest friends is to create either a private WhatsApp or Facebook group (or whatever other means you prefer using) and add the few closest usual suspects you would normally be hanging out with week after week. It’ll allow you all to continue to make your dorky jokes, jibes and for you to upload pictures of your lockdown shenanigans for you to keep the friendship love alive without judgement of your wider social networks.
Bet for sweat: Exercise is something we all take for granted and just don’t do enough of. So, find that one person you know who has the same motivations as you to lose weight, get fit or just stretch, and make a monthly affordable* bet (I’m talking £5 max) with them. Then arrange the same time each week (or three times a week if you’re serious about it) and get on video chat to do a training session together. I used to do the Insanity workouts like this with a friend - great motivator to see each other sweat together! There are thousands of workout programs on YouTube, so not being able to look for one is not an acceptable excuse.
Activity buddy: TONS of places are now offering their courses for free online (here’s looking at you, Harvard). We’ve even had an insurgence of tutorial videos being posted (I know I’m being served those ads, at least!), so get one of your more creative and motivated buddies to take a course with you - or find a fun tutorial and do that together each week/month. Performing a similar activity with someone increases the bond you’ll have, as well as introducing something fun to do to make isolation time go by. Plus, at the end of it, you’ll be able to look back at the collective memories and reminisce about stuff you are both bad at, like ‘Introductory Drawing’.
Movie night: Get a heap of your loved ones together and set the third Thursday of every month as your digital movie night. Obviously, you can ‘host’ a movie night however many times as you like, but just like above, set a time, date and movie theme and as the host you can gather the masses for your virtual movie fest. Netflix have even started Netflix Party, their own free downloadable plugin, that allows you all to get together, watch Netflix and chat together as you watch. This is even better than going to the cinema with friends because you can’t talk in the cinema!
There you have it, my lone rangers. This time is not just about keeping yourself busy, but also social. Use the tools listed above to your advantage and become the social master of your friends’ circle.
While this article has been written with fun in mind, I am aware that for some this time can be angst-ridden, so I point you towards the resources that know how to help you in the current climate.
*It’s best not to be foolish and make bets that you can’t afford. I am not responsible if you do.